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[necrosavior]

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[necrosavior]

Indeed, at worst she'll say no, and I'll get as much paint licked off of me as I am now.

Why stop at one meat? I'm thinking meat cubes rolled in spices, and there can be different spices and different meats. A real meat salad.

[fogsong]

Nothing can be lost but everything can be gained!

That sounds awful but you're the Jesus of... IDK, the Houses Universe. Jesus chooses their fantastic communion/community dinner spread.

[necrosavior]

That's what I like.

What's awful about mystery meat cubes when they are all tasty? Ha. Nine House Jesus. I'm sure Silas would call me an anti-Jesus.

[fogsong]

The mystery meat cube part, Gideon. Also, Jesus had all kinds of denouncers. That's just how it goes when you're the child of god.

[necrosavior]

Mystery like beef and pork and chicken! Not gross stuff. Pffft, I've always had my denouncers. Would love to see their faces when they learn God's my dad. Take that, suckers.

[fogsong]

Yeah, I don't want to eat a bowl of hot dogs & bologna but to each their own! Only a little judgment!

Hey, maybe they'll suck up to you after. Get all grovelly and weepy. "Oh, Jesus-Gideon, how stupid we were to have missed it!"

[necrosavior]

What would be YOUR personal weird salad of choice?

Oh man, imagining the great aunts blessing me and shit is so creepy. Everything they do is creepy. I just hope it gives Crux a heart attack.

[fogsong]

Watermelon salad! It's got mint in it!

Just threaten to tell your dad about him. Bet that'll kick that heart into overdrive and then zap.

[necrosavior]

What else is in it? Or is it just watermelon and mint?

Haha, I wish. There's no way my dad would show up to the Ninth House. That'd be like end of the world times.

[fogsong]

Cucumber and... feta cheese, I think. Simple, and notably not meaty.

What about a phone call? Video call?

[necrosavior]

I mean, I'll try it. Meat isn't an evil thing, you know. Especially not when you grew up without nearly as much as you'd like.

That isn't really a thing across that vast a distance. We got a letter summoning us to Canaan House.

[fogsong]

Meat isn't evil. Mysterious meat cube salad might be.

Then make him send a letter! Or a video message! There are options, Gideon.

[necrosavior]

How about this? We can have dinner sometime with both of our salads, and we can both try both. Surely you can handle facing mystery spiced meat one time.

Sure. My personal plan was never go back to the Ninth House again.

[fogsong]

Sounds like a plan to me.

Whatever works for you.

[necrosavior]

Nom nom nom. I love plans with food.

100%. Best plan. Let the great aunts die. Finally.

[fogsong]

Honestly. Same.

Dark but I like it.

[necrosavior]

Best plans. Food plans. And sword plans.

Honestly, it's more incredible they're still alive. Somehow. They're aaaaaaancient.

[fogsong]

I mean, given your dad's age and all... What's ancient here?

[necrosavior]

He is special ancient. Magical ancient. The great aunts are just normal human ancient. Like a hundred. I swear.

[ It's probably not a hundred. Gideon doesn't care. She'll round up. ]

[fogsong]

Ah, okay. Normal ancient. Then you don't gotta worry, they're bound to kill over. Hell, one of them could've died during this very conversation.

[necrosavior]

Wouldn't that be a relief. It'd be so nice if any of them kicked the bucket while I was gone. Or Crux. Especially Crux. You have no idea how many times I've taken him down here in trials. Fucker won't go.

[fogsong]

He won't go until Thirteen thinks he no longer bothers you.

[necrosavior]

That's fucking shit. [ So. Never? ]

[fogsong]

And just like that you can see your future. Sorry.

[necrosavior]

[ Gideon leaves an audio file that is a scream of frustration. You're welcome, Sharon. ]